- Mood: bummed
- Subject: still alive and complainin
- Date and Time: 10/9/06 12:36 a.m.
- Plans for the day: clean and play with aidan
I can't belive it's been about a year since I last wrote. Aidan is going to be 16 months old (1 year and 4 months for people who do not have kiddos) so Brandon said he wants to marry me but only If I to keep the house clean, and manage my money better, now it's I want to get our current debt in order before we make another (witch I can understand) but all I can think about is why doesn't a guy want to marry me what's wrong with me, even though he says he wants to get married part of me thinks he just doesn't want to marry me. oh the latest thing is yes he wants to get married to me, he said I quate "we have been togeather nearly three years of course I want to marry you" THEN WHY THE FUDGE HASN'T HE ASKED ME YET!!! oh he also said I can start planning our wedding but I can't set any dates for it ahhhhhhh that doesn't help, how can I plan for something when I don't even know when to have it............ this relationship is in some ways Idenical to my x that I spent 6 years with. with the whole marrage thing, then about six months after I left the x I found out he's engaged. that's where I get what wrong with me.........and I told Brandon I wasted 6 years with the x that I am not going to do that again, so far we are talking 2008 but he keeps thinking about the darn debt looks to be later and later every time we talk about it. there's what's left of our credit card and loan debt and the hospital charges from having aidan so lets see credit card 3500 loan 1300 hospital 2000=around 6,800 then he tacks on his unpaid medical bills from nebraska (before we met) and it totals around he said 8,000 to 9,000 we have been working on the others for 3 years now it was 10,000 and we are only at 6,800, ahhh my x needs to sell the house (our house) soon that will be at least 4,000 then with tax season right around the corner again last year it was about 5,000 so there's the blooming 9,000 to finish the debt off so I have to think of a way to start saving for our wedding I think every other pay check I get goes in to a savings account for it, that way tax season of 2008 will be for our wedding (he wants a big screen t.v. yeah right I want the rings 1st then he can get his toys) oh by the way I now work the apts I live at i'm a caretaker it pays the rent and keeps me home with Aidan. well going to go now this is long enough good night all.
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